From walter.bankovitch@stanfordalumni.org Tue Aug 13 16:10:39 2002
Date: Tue, 13 Aug 2002 19:40:46 -0000
From: Walter Bankovitch
To:
Subject: Management Course
Status: RO

Lesson One:
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit
saw the crow & asked him, "Can I also sit like you & do nothing all day
long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on
the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared,
jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Management Lesson?
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high
up.

Lesson Two:
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to
the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the
energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied
the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of
dung, found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest
branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he
reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, he was
proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by
a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Management Lesson?
Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

Lesson Three:
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird
froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying
there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay
there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was.
The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and
happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing
and came to investigate. Following the
sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung
and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Management Lesson?
1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

Here endeth your management course.


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