So now we've recently had quite some drama about a crossplayer. Someone who uses at least one avatar whose gender isn't his own.

Being tricked into virtual sex and then ghosted if you were hoping for something permanent is one thing. The sudden discovery of avatars who are NOT the virtual representations of real-life people but completely unrelated to their users is another thing.

The biggest issue seems to be avatars with genders different from their users'. Or rather, people not knowing that this smouldering hot lady is a GIRL (Guy In Real Life). From this, demands arose that all cross-playing avatars shall inform people that they're cross-playing avatars. Some may even demand a total ban on cross-playing.

On the other hand, there are users whose avatars aren't them, and who want to keep their real lives as secret as possible. They also don't want to know anything about the users behind other avatars, especially not without asking first. OpenSim is a role-play to them, and real life breaks immersion.

Now, the question is: What'd be the best practice then?

Keeping it secret may end up in awkward situations with avatars that are virtual representations of their real-life users instead of fictional role-play characters. Blurting it out without being asked (female avatar arriving at a party: "Hi, I'm a cishet guy in real life!") leaves a lot of people with TMI (Too Much Information).

But there actually is a standard place for real-life information. And your real-life gender is exactly that, real-life information. That place is in your avatar profile.

No, not the "2nd life" page, the first page you see when you open your profile or someone else's. That page is exclusively for in-world information about your avatar.

The place for real-life information about you is on the "1st life" page. That and only that is also where a real-life photograph of you should go if you absolutely have to have one in our avatar profile. And that's the right place to tell people about your real-life gender.

A big advantage of this is that people who check your profile because they're interested in your avatar but not in your real life won't have real-life information about you slapped into their faces. The "1st life" page is not the first thing you see when looking at someone's profile.

Granted, this practice isn't perfect. There are people who find it inconvenient to have to navigate through a profile, and who demand all information they want to know be served to them on a silver platter, i.e. on the very first profile page. Others don't want to read profiles at all (or anything, in fact), they want male crossplayers with female avatars to tell them right away that they're guys in real life without themselves asking for it. The real-life information they want to know would be readily available to them, they just can't be bothered to look it up.

But I guess there are also people who don't want to see any real-life information in avatar profiles, who don't even want to accidentally stumble upon it by clicking on the wrong tab, because they don't want to know anything about the real-life people behind avatars, at least not more than necessary.

Stil, going this "official" way should be good enough for most people.